What is Emotional Abuse?
Emotional abuse, encompassing psychological and verbal abuse, is challenging to identify due to its non-physical nature. Unlike physical abuse, it leaves no visible signs such as black eyes, swollen lips, or broken bones. Yet every day people are subjected to this invisible form of abuse. No matter how invisible however, the damage inflicted can be equally as severe as physical violence, leaving deep emotional scars and a torrent of trauma in the form of deep-seated self-doubt, feelings of worthlessness, and much more.
Emotional abuse involves controlling another person through tactics like criticism, humiliation, shaming, blaming, or other forms of manipulation. A relationship is typically deemed emotionally abusive when there is a persistent pattern of harmful words and bullying behaviours that gradually erode a person's self-esteem and damage their mental health.
Examples of Emotional Abuse [1]
- Making unreasonable demands, such as expecting you to drop everything to spend time with them.
- Not allowing you to have a different opinion.
- Dismissing what you say as fiction or a lie.
- Refusing to accept your feelings about a situation.
- Accusing you of exaggerating everything.
- Calling you needy or selfish when you express your wants or needs.
- Constantly picking faults in your appearance or pointing out your flaws.
- Humiliating you in public or private and downplaying it.
- Treating you as inferior.
- Belittling you in conversation.
- Controlling who you see and when.
- Tracking you electronically, such as with a GPS on your car or apps like 'Find My Friends.'
- Using jealousy or paranoia as a sign of love.
The Link Between Emotional Abuse and PTSD
Emotional abuse is increasingly recognised as a significant factor in the development of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Victims of emotional abuse often endure prolonged psychological trauma, leading to symptoms similar to those caused by physical violence. The constant fear, anxiety, and erosion of self-worth experienced in emotionally abusive relationships can trigger PTSD, manifesting as flashbacks, nightmares, severe anxiety, and uncontrollable thoughts about the abuse.
Research indicates that the brain processes emotional pain similarly to physical pain, suggesting that emotional abuse can leave deep, lasting scars on mental health.
Prevalence and Awareness
In 2014, the European Union Agency for Fundamental Rights (FRA) surveyed violence against women and found that 31% of Irish women surveyed had experienced some form of psychological violence by a partner since the age of 15. [2] Additionally, a report by Safe Ireland found that emotional abuse is the most prevalent form of coercive control in Ireland. [3]
Legal Status of Emotional Abuse in Ireland
In Ireland, the legal recognition of emotional abuse has progressed significantly in recent years. The Domestic Violence Act 2018 marked a pivotal change by introducing the offence of coercive control, which encompasses a range of emotionally abusive behaviours. Coercive control refers to patterns of psychological and emotional abuse designed to dominate and isolate the victim, severely impacting their independence and wellbeing. This legislative framework allows victims to seek protection and justice even in the absence of physical violence. The law provides for restraining orders, safety orders, and barring orders to protect individuals from ongoing emotional and psychological abuse. By recognising the seriousness of emotional abuse and its profound effects, Ireland's legal system aims to provide more comprehensive protection and support for victims.
Three Tips to Survive Emotional Abuse
1. Reach Out to Trusted Individuals: Confide in friends, family members, or colleagues who you trust. Sharing your experiences with someone who listens and believes you can provide much-needed emotional support and validation.
2. Seek Professional Help: Contact a therapist, counsellor, or support group specialising in emotional abuse. Professional guidance can help you understand your situation, develop coping strategies, and work towards healing and recovery.
3. Utilise Support Services: Access resources like hotlines, women's shelters, and domestic abuse organisations. These services offer confidential advice, safety planning, and practical assistance to help you navigate your options and find a path to safety and well-being.
Support for Victims
The Wellspring of Life are trained to help women and women with children who have been subjected to coercive control as well as other forms of domestic abuse. If you feel that you need to discuss your situation, please contact us through our website: https://www.thewellspringoflife.ie/
Take steps today to educate yourself and others about emotional abuse. Support victims by listening, believing, and offering help. Advocate for change by raising awareness and pushing for stronger legal protections. Together, we can make a difference and help end the cycle of abuse.
For further reading, see:
[2] European Union Agency for Fundamental Rights (FRA) Survey https://whatwouldyoudo.ie/ajax/getmaterial?free=1&f=Psychological_and_emotional_domestic_abuse.pdf